Princess Melt

By: James DC

 

Once upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter, the PRINCESS.But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt. No matter what; metal, wood, stone, Anything she touched would melt. Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her. The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king, “If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured.” The king was overjoyed and came up with a plan next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king’s wealth. THREE YOUNG PRINCES TOOK UP THE CHALLENGE. The first brought a sword of the finest steel. But alas, when the princess touched it, it melted, and t he prince went away sadly. The second prince brought diamonds. He thought diamonds are the hardest substance in the world and would not melt. But alas, once the princess touched them, they melted. He too was sent away disappointed. The third prince approached. He told the princess, “Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there.” The princess did as she was told, though she turned red. She felt something hard. She held it in her hand. And it did not melt!!! The king was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed. And the third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after.

Question: What was in the prince’s pants?
Answer: M&M’s of course. They melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
What were you thinking??
****
REAL LOVE
I’ve been in love with the same woman for 49 years… If my wife finds out, she’ll kill me!
***
BLUE SILK PAJAMAS
A man phones home from his office and says to
his wife, “I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It’s
the opportunity of a lifetime. I have to leave right away.
Pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and my blue silk
pajamas. I’ll be home in an hour to pick them up.”
The man rushes home to grab everything. He
hugs his wife, apologizes for the short notice, and then hurries
off.
A week later, the man returns and his wife asks,
“Did you have a good trip, dear?”
The man replies, “Yep, the fishing was
great…but you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas.”
His wife smiles and says, “Oh, no I didn’t…I put
them in your tackle box.
***
The Confessional Box
I went into the confessional box after years of being away
from the Church. Inside I found a fully equipped bar
with Guinness on tap. On one wall, there’s a row of
decanters with fine Irish whiskey and Waterford crystal
glasses.
On the other wall is a dazzling array of the finest
cigars and chocolates. Then the priest comes in. I say to
him, “Father, forgive me, for it’s been a very long time
since I’ve been to confession, but I must first
admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than
it used to be.”
He replies: “Get out, you moron, you’re on my
side!”

Happy birthday to LOL host, James DC, surrounded by LOL cast & friends.

From left, Gina, Karla, Robert, Girlie, James, Melody, Arizza & Mary Jane.

 

LOL performing a funny scene, from left, Robert. David, Arizza, Mary Jane, Karla & James DC.