A Valentine’s Message Lasting For A Lifetime

 

By: Nancy H. Abiera

 

“RELATIONSHIP is like a camera. FOCUS on important things or life can be blurry. TAKE PICTURES of the great memories otherwise, bad memories will take over. Use LOVE as a background or towers of HATRED will build great walls. DEVELOP, LEARN and CHANGE from the negatives letting TRUTH prevail. If you do not like the pictures,DELETE them. BE PATIENT, TRY AGAIN and CAPTURE a few more shots.” Nancy H. Abiera

I remember when I was young, people said that couples who get married are about to “settle down” (calm down in peace) or in Tagalog: “Lalagay sa tahimik.”

My understanding is that the brideto- be and groom-tobe are both ready to have a sacred union in marriage and share the love, joy, peace, etc. to start a family. In fact, no couples plan to marry with an intention to separate or divorce later. Everybody believes in their heart the saying: “and they live happily ever after.” Otherwise, no one will get married to “live miserably ever after.”

However, let’s face reality. Why are break-ups in relationships or marriage/ family so common these days? Here in the United States alone, the statistics are scary. Other countries are no exception either as we are all experiencing the spiraling down and disintegration of family into broken pieces. Just for your information, Divorce Rates in the United States are as follows:

First marriages 41-50% Out of 10 marriages, 4-5 couples end up divorce.
Second marriages 60-67% Out of 10 marriages, 6-7 couples end up divorce.
Third marriages 73-74% Out of 10 marriages, 7 couples end up divorce.

Could it be that the reason there not much difference in the last two is because of the trauma from the second failure that they are so scared to try again and end in loss?

In light of the above, I would like to encourage you by sharing some true-to-life powerful principles in relationships like “Couples in GOOD relationships learn from their mistakes; Couples in GREAT relationships learn from other GOOD couples’ mistakes.”

Rewinding back thirty one years ago, picture this: A broken-hearted single woman left the Philippines and ran to the United States. All throughout her journey in America, she was singing “How Can You Mind A Broken Heart? She toured Los Angeles, San Francisco, New York and ended in Chicago, hoping to find Mr. Prince Charming. She faced her fear of being broken-hearted head on. She met and married a twice-divorced man after 19 days in Chicago. A year after, they had the first baby followed by another one. They bought a house and continued life juggling career, church, social life and family. They went through so much testings in life from parenting, job loss, career changes, financial difficulty, health, marriage, inlaws, children going to college, empty nesting, weddings, grandchildren and other family celebrations as well as challenges. You name it, we had it. That is my story in a nutshell.

My husband and I had gone through in relationships and marriage from worst to worse to bad to good and still hoping it be good and be great. We had many joyful and happy memories as well as painful trials/errors we tried deleting after learning the hard lessons in life.

Problem-proof life with the following Ten True-To-Life Lessons on Love and Relationships:

1. RUSH NOT or you might CRASH.

2. PRAY daily together for God’s wisdom or the devil will PREY on you.

3. COMMUNICATE thoughts, feelings & desires without ABC (Accuse, Blame, Condemn)

4. LISTEN to understand before TALKING to be understood.

5. Be SELFLESS and not SELFISH as you might smell like one.

6. SERVE each other or you will end up BOSSING each other.

7. Be BEST FRIENDS, otherwise, you can be WORST ENEMIES.

8. Continue DATING not HATING on a regular basis.

9. FORGIVE, FORGIVE, FORGIVE and FORGET FAULTS.

10. Let LOVE grow daily, moment by moment and be GREAT LOVERS FOREVER.

“Love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, is not boastful, is not conceited, does not act improperly, is not selfish, is not provoked, and does not keep a record of wrongs. Love finds no joy in unrighteousness but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. . .Faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.”

1 Corinthians 13:4-13 Let there be Faith in your soul… Hope in your mind…Love in your heart today and forever.

Happy Valentines Day! I love you readers with the love of the Lord yet God loves you the most. Smile and be a blessing. . .