Part G – Nursing Home Plan

By: James DC

 

Say you are an older senior citizen and can no longer take care of yourself and the government says there is no Nursing Home care available for you. So, what do you do? You opt for Medicare Part G.

The plan gives anyone 75 or older a gun (Part G) and one bullet. You are allowed to shoot one worthless politician. This means you will be sent to prison for the rest of your life where you will receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating and air conditioning, cable TV, a library, and all the Health Care you need. Need new teeth? No problem. Need glasses? That’s great. Need a hearing aid, new hip, knees, kidney, lungs, sex change, or heart? They are all covered!

As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you at least as often as they do now! And, who will be paying for all of this? The same  overnment that just told you they can’t afford for you to go into a nursing home. And you will get rid of a useless politician while you are at it. And now,
because you are a prisoner, you don’t have to pay any more income taxes!

Is this a great country or what? Now that you have solved your senior financial plan, enjoy the rest of your week!

Raid sa Divisoria by NBI…

NBI: Fake mga bags na ito, ah !
Tindera: Hindi sir, lokal ang mga ito!
*
NBI: Lokal ang YSL?
Tindera: Oo naman,
“Yari Sa Laguna”
*
NBI Hmmm… Ang DKNY?
Tindera: Gawa sa
“Divisoria Kanto Ng Ylaya”!
*
NBI: Ang GQ, local pa rin?
Tindera:?Op kors!
“Galing Quiapo”!
*
NBI: Lusot palagi ah..
Eh ang Lacoste?
Tindera: Hay naku sir, yang buwaya?
Galing Congress!
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SENATOR MIRIAM’S JOKES:

Top 3 na pinakasinungaling na trabaho sa Pilipinas:
Number 3: Beautician: Sasabihin nilang maganda ang customer kahit hindi naman talaga.
Number 2: Konduktor ng jeep: Sasabihin niya na dalawa pa ang kasya kahit puno na.
Number 1: Pulitiko. That’s the end of the story.
English translaiton/////
(The top 3 jobs with the most liars in the Philippines:
Number 3: beautician. They will say the customer is beautiful even when she is not.
Number 2: jeepney conductor. He will say there is still room for two even when the jeepney is full.
Number 1: politicians. That’s the end of the story)
“Kapag magse-selfie, siguraduhin mong hindi maputi ang mukha tapos maitim naman ang leeg mo. Dapat din hindi sobrang puti ang katawan tapos maitim naman ang kilikili. Tandan mo tao ka, hindi ka Zebra.” Translation: (If you’ll take a ‘selfie” shot, make sure your face is not white
then your neck is dark. Your body should not also so white, but your armpit is dark. Remember, you’re human, not a zebra).

From left: David, Robert, Mary Jane & James DC.

LOL Gang: Front: Karla, Mary Jane, Boyet Olano, guest from SF, & James. Back: Robert & David.

All looking happy with the new green screen background: Karla, Robert, Mary Jane, Boyet Olano, David & James.